Nancy Milne of Kitchener

Born: Dec. 9, 1918 in Montreal

Died: Dec. 14, 2009 of multiple organ failure

KITCHENER — There was an unwavering determination to Nancy Milne, an ability to see a problem then solve it, regardless of obstacles. When Nancy set her mind to something, it was best to just get out of her way.

An occupational therapist, master gardener, painter, craftsperson, traveler and ardent volunteer, Nancy sampled all the best things life, but it wasn’t always easy. Born in Montreal, the eldest of three, Nancy’s father was an engineer with a PhD and her mother a teacher. Both parents were “very distinguished,” said Nancy’s daughter Jennifer Robinson, though her mother’s gifts had a strong connection to the physical.

“She was so good with her hands,” said Jennifer, adding, “she thought outside the box.” Son David Milne explained the action of her hands in busy motion somehow helped her mind create a solution for any problem at hand. “She thought with her hands,” he said.

After attending art school in Montreal, Nancy chose a career as an occupational therapist, a growing profession during and after the Second World War and one that was very much hands-on: perfect for Nancy. She graduated from Tufts University in Massachusetts in the 1940s and soon after, altered the course of her life when she met John Milne.

Tall and handsome but very ill, John was a patient at the tuberculosis sanatorium in Montreal where Nancy worked and while it was forbidden for staff to become involved with patients, for Nancy and John, they would not be deterred. Nancy’s own minister refused to marry the couple, warning that John would be dead within five years and he didn’t want to see her widowed so young, likely with small children. The couple then approached a minister from an Anglican church who agreed to the marriage though the first minister proved right. John died when David was five and Jennifer was eight, leaving Nancy a widow. Jennifer said they knew their mother was very much in love with their father and after he died, she never spoke about how she felt or how difficult life had suddenly become.

“She was single in the 1950s and ’60s, before single parents were common,” said David. “We were latch key kids before it was common.”

Now it was up to Nancy to support the family, working full-time in a veterans hospital, while raising the children with the help of her parents who lived in the neighbourhood.

Jennifer said she admired Nancy, for her determination and tenacity, how she was always ready to listen and support, though she was never the warm, cuddly type.

By age 55, Nancy was ready for a change in her life. Her children, both grown and embarking on their own careers, had moved to Ontario and Nancy decided to follow, moving to Stratford where she was only a train ride from David in Kitchener and Jennifer in Georgetown. She found a job at the Stratford hospital and partook of the culture and beauty of the area’s landscapes, becoming a certified master gardener and writing a regular gardening column for the local newspaper.

“She was one of the people who created Meadowrue Corner Nature Gardens,” said David, describing one of the first native species gardens in the area. “She was naturalizing before naturalizing was even a phrase,” he said. Nancy also became a Tai Chi instructor and had been an avid Nordic skier and figure skater much of her life. David said “she was always involved in the community.” But Nancy also took it a step further, learning a new skill which she then would teach to others.

She also continued to travel to the far flung reaches of the world, occasionally as part of an Elderhostel program, and as intrepid as she was, Nancy never learned to drive. Her children explain, their mother had a rare eye condition that caused her eyes to constantly shift back and forth. She learned to move her head back and forth to compensate. “They had told her, she’d never learn to read,” said Jennifer. She not only read, Nancy became a superb craftswoman and a painter with an eye for detail.

Nancy was also a good solid friend who kept in touch with everyone, regardless of how many miles separated them.

She moved to Kitchener in 1993, a decade after retiring, first to an apartment then, after a series of strokes, to a seniors’ home where she remained fiercely independent to the end.

Jennifer said “people were drawn to her. She was interested in what was going on around her. She asked questions.” David added, his mother related to the professional staff at the home and she was forever helping out other residents.

In 2002, Nancy was presented with an Ontario Volunteer Service Award for her contributions to numerous organizations, including Joseph Schneider Haus in Kitchener.

Jennifer explained “she was very modest, very private.” Though David added “she was very proud of what she did.” Nancy had high standards for her self and for everyone else.

David’s wife Sandy remembers Nancy as highly competitive, adventuresome, a good cook.

“She was good at whatever she set her mind to.”

vhill@therecord.com